All in one superb BBC Online report: John Prescott supports the silly Bluewater ban on hoodies because he was nearly the victim of a “happy slapping”.

Apparently the young thugs that terrorised the deputy prime minister — where is special branch when you need them? — all wore hoods. Ergo the rest of us shouldn’t be allowed to wear them, either.

And then there’s this priceless graf:

Some newspapers claimed Mr Prescott looked miserable when the Cabinet reshuffle was under way last week but he insisted that was his “normal face”.